Edge of Collapse
by WolfPatronusTeamPeeta-and-Dean
Summary: Sequel to Mending Broken Hearts. Peeta and Katniss have to attend the Victor's Tour, and then they'll have to participate in the 75th Hunger Games. Katniss and Peeta are in love, and will fight by each other's side until the end. They are willing to make sacrifices for each other. Fluffy, cute Everlark. *Things from the book and the movie are incorporated in this story.*
1. Tour Day

**A/N: Hi! So excited for this sequel. I hope you all enjoy it! For those of you who don't know, this is the sequel to Mending Broken Hearts and I highly recommend reading it before you read this. Please review! This is the longest chapter I have ever written and it would be nice to be rewarded with some reviews :) Thanks everyone!**

**-WolfPatronusTeamPeeta-and-Dean**

_Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own the Hunger Games trilogy. If I did Gale would not exist and Katniss wouldn't be so mean to Peeta in the first book. I will use some of the plot from Catching Fire as well as quotes. Also, I will use stuff from the movie. Otherwise, this work is my own._

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**Tour Day**

Katniss took the phone from Peeta's hand and clicked it off. She reached over him and put it back on the night stand.

"Three o'clock." Peeta said. Katniss nodded, knowing what he meant without needing any more information. She turned her face to Peeta's and leaned her forehead against his. She couldn't think of any words to say.

"It's going to be ok." She said.

"I know." Peeta said softly.

Katniss pulled her face away from Peeta's when a thought came into her head. "Oh my god. Peeta, the cameras are going to be here expecting us to be happy with our families. Your family doesn't live with you anymore, _I do_, and my mom and Prim live by themselves."

"Oh, that's _not_ good." Peeta said. He ran his hands through his hair, leaving it rumpled and cute. "I'll just say that my family didn't want to live too far from the bakery so they just stayed at our old house but told me I deserved to live somewhere better. And you can just go back to your house today so when the crew gets here it will look like you still live there."

Katniss nodded absently, running his plan through her head. "Ok. That seems fine."

"We'll be fine." She looked Peeta in the eye, knowing he truly believed what he had said.

"I love you Peeta." She murmured, still gazing into his eyes.

He smiled at her and moved his face close to hers. He didn't stop until his lips were almost on hers. "I love you too," he whispered.

Feeling his soft, warm breath on her lips made Katniss tingle. She moved closer and kissed him. She threaded her fingers in his soft, golden hair. He slipped his hands under her shirt and traced teasing patterns on her skin. They lay back down on the bed and Katniss nestled her face in the crook of his neck. He smoothed his hands over her back.

"I just wish three o'clock was here already." She whispered.

"So do I; I'm going to be dreading it all day." Peeta groaned.

"Me too." Katniss sighed. "When should I go back to my mom's house?" She felt muscles in Peeta's neck move as he smiled.

"You called it your mom's house. Not 'my house', not 'my old house'."

Katniss lifted her head and looked deep into his eyes. "Well, yeah. The only house I want to call mine is the one with you." She said softly.

Peeta eyes filled with love and happiness. "Really?"

Katniss smiled. "Really." Peeta grinned back. "And the only place I'd call home is in your arms." She added tenderly.

Peeta looked like he was at a loss for words. He looked so happy, and it spread to Katniss. "I'm so happy you feel that way. Katniss, you don't know how much I love you."

"You make me feel really happy, Peeta. And if you love me as much as I love you, than I think I know how much you love me." She leaned over and kissed him sweetly on the lips. She rested her head on his chest and drew circles on his stomach with the tip of her finger.

They stayed in bed a while longer before getting up for breakfast. Katniss didn't even bother to put on pants. She was wearing Peeta's shirt and it was long enough that she didn't really care. The tile floor was cold on her bare feet. A small shiver ran through her as she followed Peeta into the kitchen. He went to the fridge and got a couple of eggs to make them some omelettes. Katniss made them some coffee and sank down in her chair, setting Peeta's mug at his seat.

After a few minutes Peeta brought over a plate with a perfect omelette on it, made with only ham and cheese, just the way Katniss liked it. "Thanks." She said, smiling softly at him.

"You're welcome," he said as he sat down with his own omelette. He took his coffee and took a long drink. "You make the best coffee."

Katniss shrugged. "Only for you."

They both laughed.

Peeta turned more serious. "I think you should go to your mom's house before lunch so you can have a meal with them before we leave. Plus we both need to get used to being without each other."

"Ok." Katniss said.

After they finished their breakfast, they washed their dishes together and left them on a rack to dry. They went back upstairs to brush their teeth. Peeta was flossing and Katniss was combing her hair. Peeta put down his floss, looking at her with affection.

"You're so beautiful, Katniss. I know you don't really believe that you are, and you brush off my compliments, but I really think you're beautiful. You're the most gorgeous girl I've ever laid my eyes on. I can't believe you ever took a second glance at me."

Katniss blushed furiously. "Peeta…"

"No, I mean it. You're stunning." He said.

"Thank you, Peeta," was all she could manage behind her blush.

"You're welcome." He smiled cutely.

When they were done, Katniss followed Peeta into the closet.

He turned to her. "Are you here to pick out my outfit?" he joked.

Katniss quirked her eyebrow, moving closer towards him. She stood on her tip toes and put her lips close to his ear. "No." she whispered. "Quite the opposite."

"What?" Peeta asked with amused astonishment.

Katniss kissed along his jaw until she got to his lips. She kissed him steadily, pushing her fingers into his hair. Peeta wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him, returning her kisses with verve. Katniss trailed her hands down from his face over his chest and to his stomach. She lifted the hem of his shirt up until it reached his underarms. She gently nudged his arms and he lifted them up. She pulled away and took it off of him, smiling at him. She let his shirt fall on the floor and tentatively put her hand on his chest, over his heart, feeling his strong heartbeat. She let her other hand rest on his stomach.

"Why can't you believe that I took a second glance at you?" she asked softly, tilting her head and looking into his eyes.

He blushed a little. "Because you're so beautiful, and I'm just… average."

"Peeta, you are not average. Don't you remember what I told you the night we got back together? I told you that you were the most stunning boy I had ever met. You're gorgeous, Peeta. If you don't believe that, you have to know that every girl at school would stop and stare at you, would die if you smiled at them. You don't know how many hearts you broke when you told Panem that you had a crush on me since you were five."

"You don't mean that." He murmured.

"Yes I do, Peeta. You're very good looking, everyone knows that. You should too." She leaned a little closer to him. "I think you're _very_ handsome. You're striking. You think I never noticed you in school but you _always_ caught my eye. And now I can't believe that you're all mine." By the time she was done their faces were an inch apart. She could feel his heart racing.

Peeta smiled. "Thanks."

"I really mean it." She smiled back.

"Thank you." He said softly.

Katniss moved her hands and touched his face delicately. "You're welcome." He kissed her again and let his hands run under her shirt. She loved it when he did that. When he let his hands wander over skin, it made her feel all tingly. She reached behind her and grabbed Peeta's hands, pulling them to the hem of her shirt. He took her signal and slowly began to take her shirt off. She lifted her arms up and Peeta pulled away so he could take it off her head. Now she was only in her underclothes. He ran his fingers through her hair. She pulled on the draw string of his pyjama pants playfully.

"Katniss we're kissing in the closet." Peeta said teasingly.

"Fine." She took his hand and tugged him out of the closet. She sat down on the bed and pulled on his hand. "Is this better?"

He leaned down on top of her. "Much better." Peeta let his hands rove over Katniss's skin while he kissed her. She rested her knees against his sides and let her heart take over. She kissed him with all she had. She wanted to forget about the Victory Tour. She wanted to put the pressure she knew she was going to feel to the back of her mind. She didn't want to think about what was going to happen in the Districts or the Capitol. Katniss just wanted to be happy with her time alone with Peeta while she could.

He moved his kisses down her throat onto her collarbone. He kissed down her arm and gently held her wrist, kissing the middle of her palm. Warmth from where his lips touched her spread up her arm and into her heart. She entwined her fingers with his and Peeta leaned down to kiss her again when the phone rang. Katniss growled and slid out from under Peeta. She reached for the phone and answered it.

"What?" she barked.

"Katniss…" Peeta warned.

Katniss gave him a deadly look. She was mad that their moment had been ruined.

"_Manners, Katniss!" _Effie's voice piped on the other end. Katniss didn't respond. _"Well, hello. It's Effie again!"_

"What is it, Effie?" Katniss asked, trying to be polite.

"_Well, I'm just calling to let you know that we'll actually be arriving around one o'clock instead of three."_

"One o'clock? Why?" she demanded.

"_We had been expecting delays because of weather but everything actually seems fine, therefore the earlier arrival."_

"Oh. Ok." Katniss said.

"_Oh, Katniss, why are you answering Peeta's phone? Your mother said you were still sleeping when I called your house this morning."_

"Oh, umm, I was. When I woke up she told me you called so I decided to drop by Peeta's house to get organized for the Tour."

"_Oh, that's wonderful. Good for you Katniss. Well, I guess that means I don't have to call your house to say we're coming earlier!" _Effie laughed.

"Yeah," Katniss forced a laugh. "I guess you don't."

"_See you soon, dear! I can't wait to see you again."_

"Bye, Effie. Me too." Then she hung up and put the phone back in its place.

"What is it, Katniss?" Peeta asked worriedly.

Katniss looked over at the clock. It was already eleven thirty. "The crew is coming earlier than three. They'll be here in an hour and a half."

"What?" Peeta asked.

"They're coming at one instead. I think I should go to my mom's house now."

"Oh, ok." She heard the disappointment in his voice. She didn't want to go but she knew she should. Katniss got off the bed and went into the closet and picked out some clothes. She changed quickly and then came back out. Peeta walked with her downstairs and helped her get her jacket on after she laced up her boots. "I wish you didn't have to go so early." He said somberly

Katniss turned around to face him. "Hey, I'll see you in a little while." She kissed him sweetly.

"Yeah, see you in a little while." He pulled her into a hug. "I love you." He murmured into her hair.

"I love you too." She whispered against his chest.

They pulled away and kissed once more before Katniss opened the door and shut it behind her. She hurried over to her mom's house, wanting to get out of the cold as soon as possible. When she got there, she debated on whether or not she should knock. She decided against it and opened the door.

A head poked out from around the corner in the kitchen. "Katniss!" Prim exclaimed, lacking her usual excitement. Her eyes showed fear.

"Prim, what's wrong?" Katniss asked, moving towards her.

Their mother appeared behind Prim. "Katniss, how was your visit at Peeta's?" Her tone matched the funny look on her face.

"What are you talking about I li-"

"We have some guests." Her mother cut her off, her eyes widening.

Two men dressed in all black walked out in front of her family. Katniss stopped dead in her tracks.

"Miss Everdeen," one of them said. "This way please."

Katniss followed them without a word, glancing over her shoulder at her mother and Prim. The men led her into the study where Prim usually did her homework. They opened the door for her and then shut it after her without following her. Her breath caught in her chest when she saw President Snow seated at the desk.

"Hello, Miss Everdeen. Please, sit."

Katniss shook herself from her daze. "President Snow. What a pleasure." She said coolly.

"Now Miss Everdeen, why don't we both agree to not lie to each other?" He said sharply.

"Yes, I think that would make things go faster." She agreed.

"Very good." He leaned across the desk. "You see, Katniss, I have a problem."

His breath stank of blood. Katniss tried to ignore it, but how does someone's breath smell like blood? Did he drink it? "What would that be?"

"Panem is fragile. It is delicate, and certain things can collapse it. Things, perhaps, like a handful of poisonous berries."

"Must be very fragile, then." Katniss said.

"Yes, unfortunately. I'll cut straight to the point. Your love story isn't believed in every District. They believe that when you pulled out those berries you were defying the Capitol, showing rebellion. Some people have even conjured a silly fantasy that they can do it too." He looked at her hard. "Do you know what that means? It means that they think an uprising wouldn't be too impossibly hard."

"What are you trying to tell me?"

"You fought very hard in the Games, Miss Everdeen. But they were games." His voice was harsh. "Would you like to be in a real war? Imagine thousands upon thousands of your people, dead. Your loved ones, gone."

"What do you need me to do?" Katniss asked, trying to hide the fear she felt.

"Convince them that you're in love with that boy. That he's the only reason you pulled out those berries. Your love blinded you and made you make a rash decision to end your life because only one of you could survive and you couldn't live without him."

Katniss spoke before she could stop herself. "But I _am_ in love with him."

"Don't lie." Snow said loudly. "In the Games, we have Peeta showing his love for you here and there. We have him looking at you with adoration. We have him allying himself with the most thought dangerous group to keep them away from you. We have him coming back to make sure Cato couldn't hurt you, and that ended up getting him almost killed. And lastly, we have him asking you to kill him so you could win and return home to your family. Do you know what we have for you, Miss Everdeen?"

"Not enough." Katniss whispered.

"Precisely. If you were one in the audience, would you have believed your performance?" Katniss stayed silent. They both knew the answer. Even though Katniss loved Peeta now, she hadn't really then, when she really needed to be. "So step up your act."

"I think I'll be able to manage that." Katniss said. "I'll convince them."

"Actually, aim higher, in case you fall short. Convince _me_." Katniss nodded. "Thank you. Just remember the consequences if you fail to do so." She simply nodded again. "Now, I must ask you, did you enjoy the little gift we sent you when you arrived home? Before the Feast?"

Katniss narrowed her eyes. "You mean how you manipulated Gale and made him say all those awful things. You're the reason why he fought Peeta, why we aren't friends anymore."

"Oh, it was only a matter of time before he did that all on his own. We just, ah, sped up the process."

"You turned my best friend against me." She balled her hands into fists.

"That was just a warning Katniss." He said threateningly. "That was just a small, insignificant demonstration of the power I hold. Do you understand?"

Katniss raised her chin. "Yes, I understand."

"Good." He stood up. "Lovely chat." He plucked the white rose from his coat lapel and placed it on the desk in front of Katniss. The stench gave her a headache. "For you." He smiled like a snake, and left. Katniss waited for a good minute before she shakily got up and left, leaving the hideous flower behind. She ran all of it through her mind. She wanted to tell someone so badly. But who could she tell? Surely not her family. She didn't want Peeta to worry about it, at least not yet. She didn't want to concern Cinna about it because he had to worry about what she was wearing, and keep control over the prep team. Telling Haymitch was probably the best option.

Her mother sat straight up when Katniss entered the kitchen. "What was that all about?" she asked concernedly.

"Oh, President Snow just wanted to wish me good luck on the tour in person." She lied.

"Oh, that's nice." She sounded unsure.

"Yes. Well why don't we eat something before the crew gets here?"

They made a soup and ate in silence. Soon enough one o'clock rolled around and there was a knocking at the door. Katniss opened it and was greeted by Effie. Then Flavius, Octavia, and Venia came in. "Happy Tour Day!" they sing-songed.

Finally, Cinna entered. They hugged. "Katniss, it's so good to see you." Cinna said.

"You too. I missed you." Katniss said.

"We all missed you. Come on, let's get you showered and made up."

"Ok." Katniss sighed. She trudged up the stairs and prepared for her dreaded make over. All she really wanted was to feel Peeta's arms around her, but she'd have to wait. Every second felt like a year. She wasn't sure how much longer she could take.


	2. Tremble

_**A/N: Hi! Sorry it has taken a while to update. Exams are approaching and I've been busy with summatives and studying. But I've been writing little by little and I took a break today to finish this chapter. **_

_**I would like to take a moment to thank everyone for following, favouriting, and reviewing chapter one. It really means a lot. Please keep those reviews coming. I'd love to know how you all think I'm doing. :)**_

_**Well, I'm sure you want to get reading. This chapter is more of an emotional one, I guess. I have used ideas from the book, and movie (mostly movie) in this chapter, but have given my own personal touch, so it's a little different.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**-WolfPatronusTeamPeeta-and-Dean :)**_

_**PS: why don't you go check out my AU Everlark story, Nothing Can Keep Us Apart ? WW1, Peeta is fighting overseas and Katniss is at home. They write each other letters, cute and fluffy memories. Alternating POVs like this story. Thanks so much!**_

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**Tremble**

It was nice for Peeta to see his prep team, but their company was nothing like Katniss's. They brought back the memory of fear: fear of being sent into the Hunger Games, fear of losing Katniss. He just wanted to hold Katniss but she wasn't with him. He was quiet as he let the team prep his hair, skin, and face. They tittered happily and told Peeta about how famous he was, how famous they had become because of him and Katniss. How they were invited to almost every party. He told them that that was great, even though he didn't really care. They gushed about his paintings, as painting had become his talent. Every Victor was supposed to have a talent. It seemed as though Peeta was really good at his.

After what seemed like too long, the prep team finally drew back, smiles on their faces. Then Portia shooed them away so she could get him into his outfit. She didn't say anything, just helped him get changed and then fixed any wrinkles. When she was all done, she took a step back and looked at him.

"So, how do I look?" Peeta asked, spreading his arms.

"Handsome. And sad." Portia said softly. "How have you been, Peeta?"

Peeta shrugged. "I've been fine. I just don't want to do this tour."

Portia sighed. "It'll be ok. It's not very long."

"Yeah I know."

"Well, it's time for the cameras." Portia said.

Peeta nodded and followed her downstairs. One of the crew counted down before the cameras turned on. With every second, Peeta felt his senses become sharp and focused. One was finally reached and Peeta opened the door, his mind went blank when he saw the cameras, speakers, and microphones and other equipment positioned outside. But then he saw Katniss running over to him. He held his arms out with a huge smile on his face. She looked beautiful, but he knew that she would; she always was. Katniss beamed at him and leapt into his arms. Peeta's prosthetic leg slipped on the ice and he fell back, cushioned slightly by the snow, and Katniss fell on top of him.

Katniss giggled and pushed off him to look him in the face. He smiled at her and she gently touched his face. She leaned down and pressed her lips against his. He shut his eyes, feeling everything behind her kiss. The love, the passion, but also the fear. He could feel her lips trembling slightly. He could tell that something was wrong because she had never been like this in front of the cameras.

"Um, hello?" they heard a voice. It sounded like Caesar Flickerman. Katniss broke away from Peeta and got off of him.

"Sorry Caesar." She blushed. Peeta stood up and wrapped his arm around Katniss's shoulders.

"Oh that's quite alright." Caesar's voice said. He let out his extravagant laugh. "So, how are you over there in Twelve?"

Peeta tried not to get too freaked out by the camera coming in close to him and Katniss, zooming in on their faces. He cleared his throat and fixed his faltering smile. "We're good."

"What, that can't be all!?" Caesar exclaimed after a silent moment.

"Thanks to the generosity of the Capitol we've never been closer." Katniss says.

Peeta chuckled good-heartedly. "Yeah, fifty yards to be exact."

Katniss laughed too, nudging Peeta like what he had said was really funny.

"How wonderful! Well, looks like that's all the time we have! We'll see you two here in the Capitol soon! Good luck on the Tour!"

"Thank you," they said in unison. Then the cameras shut off.

Peeta immediately turned to Katniss. "Are you ok?"

She warily met his eyes. "Yeah."

He knew she was lying. "Katniss you can tell me if something's wrong."

"Everything's fine." She smiled, but he could see right through it.

"Ok…"

She kissed him softly on the lips. When they broke apart Effie cooed over how cute they were, and how they did a good job. Peeta saw Katniss look at him wearily. Effie then told them that it was time to board the train. They didn't need to pack anything because there would be stuff in their rooms on the train. Katniss went back to her house to say good bye to her family, and Peeta went to Haymitch's to get him on the train.

He knocked on the door but opened it anyway, knowing that Haymitch was probably passed out somewhere. Peeta found him sitting at the kitchen table, head down, bottle clutched in one hand. "Haymitch." Peeta said, standing in the doorway. No response. Peeta walked closer and called his name again. He saw a pitcher of water, thought about dumping it on him, but then thought better of it. He never forgot the time when Haymitch punched him in the face on the train on their way to the Capitol. He stood beside Haymitch and poked him in the shoulder. "Haymitch wake up. It's time to leave."

Haymitch let out a snore. Peeta sighed. "Haymitch! Wake up or I'm going to throw out all your alcohol!" He reached over and snatched the bottle from Haymitch's hand. He backed away just in time before Haymitch roared and got up, wielding a knife. He stared at Peeta and the bottle in his hand with wild eyes.

"What the hell?" Haymitch yelled. "Gimme that back!" He stuck out his hand.

Peeta kept a cool demeanor. "Put the knife down, Haymitch. Calm down."

Haymitch dropped the knife onto the table. "Happy?"

Peeta held the bottle out, and Haymitch grabbed it. He took a long swig and then looked suspiciously at Peeta. "What're you doing here, kid?"

"It's Tour Day. The train is going to leave soon."

"How wonderful." Haymitch took another swig.

"Come on, there's more liquor on the train." Peeta said. He gave Haymitch a once over. "Maybe you should change your clothes first."

Haymitch mumbled something rude while brushing past Peeta to go upstairs. Peeta yelled upstairs that he was going to go say good bye to his family before they had to leave. Haymitch told him, "Get out then!" so he did.

He started off to the bakery, avoiding eye contact with anyone he saw, knowing they'd all be staring at him, judging him, sneering with hate or looking at him in fear. When it was finally in sight, he let out a big breath. He hurried over and opened the door, welcomed by the warmth and scent of baking bread. His second oldest brother was working the counter, this was the brother that had embarrassed him and Katniss when he came to their house that one time. He smirked a little when he saw Peeta.

"Hey."

"Hey." Peeta replied. "I'm leaving for the Tour today. I just wanted to come and say good bye to you guys."

"Everyone's in the back." Peeta nodded and went to seek out the rest of his family. He found his oldest brother first, filling pastries with cream. He pulled Peeta into a playful headlock and madly ruffled his hair. Peeta laughed and shoved his brother off.

"I'm off for the Tour. I won't see you guys for a while."

"Alright. Have fun, good luck. Tell Katniss I say hi." Peeta nodded and gave his brother a final good bye. He went into the next room and saw his mother rolling some bread and his father tending to bread in the oven. His mother stopped what she was doing when she saw him.

She slightly narrowed her eyes, but Peeta walked past her, over to his father. His dad seemed to know what day it was because he embraced Peeta. "Don't get into any trouble." His father said.

"I'll try not to." Peeta laughed. "I'll miss you, Dad."

"I'll miss you too. Good luck."

"Thanks. Do you mind keeping an eye on Katniss's mom and sister?"

Before his dad could answer, his mother cut in sharply. "Your father has enough to worry about. He doesn't need to babysit that woman and her daughter. They were just fine during the Games, I think they'll manage."

Peeta turned to face his mother. "Would you like to do it then, _Mother_?"

"Like hell." She growled.

"That's why I didn't ask you. All I would like is to make sure nothing bad happens to them. Katniss seemed a little weird after visiting with them today. I just want to make sure they're ok."

His mother scoffed and turned back to her work. Peeta sighed. "I'll keep an eye out." His father said.

Peeta turned back to his dad. "Thank you. I really appreciate it."

His dad nodded and Peeta left. He said bye to his brother at the counter, ignoring the inappropriate question he asked about whether or not he thought the train was going to _rock_ a lot. Sure, it angered him that his brother was rude and immature, but nothing he could say would change him.

He opened the door, getting a cold blast of air in his face. He shivered and headed off towards the train station. He saw several Peacekeepers lined up at the station, weapons poised. He narrowed his eyes skeptically as he walked by all of them to board the train. Why were there so many of them? He got on the train quickly and let out a breath when the door glided shut. Peacekeepers had always bothered him.

He walked to the dining car, knowing that's where everyone would most likely be. Inside were Haymitch and Effie, Haymitch drowning himself in a drink and Effie reapplying a coat of make-up. Katniss wasn't in there yet, so Peeta guessed that she hadn't made it to the station yet. He sighed and looked around the dining car. There were several lavish treats spread out neatly on a table, the bar was occupied by Haymitch, and the table was set with four spots; intricately folded napkins sat atop each plate, silverware gleamed next to the dishes, glasses sparkled under the light.

He walked over to one of the armchairs and ran his hand over the back of the soft material. Memories of walking onto the train for the first time flooded back, hitting Peeta like blow to the stomach. He shut his eyes and gripped the back of the chair, trying to fight away the images, the fear he had felt, the certainty of his death, the shock of being forced into a terrifying situation with the girl he had loved for so many years.

"Peeta, are you alright darling?" Effie asked, putting down her make-up brush.

He opened his eyes and tried to relax his rigid muscles. "Yeah."

"Good. Sit down, eat something." She said, gesturing to the table behind her.

Peeta still felt uneasy, but he let go of the chair and went to go sit down on the couch. He wished Katniss was here. "Effie, why are there so many Peacekeepers outside?" Peeta asked, trying to sound casual.

Effie puffed out a little breath. "I'm not sure. They're not very nice, are they? They practically shoved me onto the train!"

"I'm sorry, Effie. That's not very nice of them."

"Thank you. You'd think with all their training that they'd learn some manners. It's really just ridiculous. Why should anyone be treated so poorly?"

Peeta stared at Effie in disbelief. Being forced to get on the train seemed like a crime to her. She had no idea how badly people could be treated, not the slightest idea of the hardships they had to endure, especially people in Twelve.

"No one deserves to be treated poorly." Was all he said.

Effie nodded in agreement and started looking at herself in the mirror again. He glanced over at Haymitch, who was eyeing Peeta suspiciously. Peeta held his stare, setting his jaw. Haymitch let out a short, breathy laugh and raised his drink to his lips.

"We haven't even left yet, Haymitch, and you're already having too much fun." Peeta turned his head to see Katniss walking into the car. Instant relief flooded through Peeta. He stood up and walked over to her, pulling her into a strong hug.

"What took you so long?" He asked.

"Peeta, I've only been gone for a half hour."

"I thought the Peacekeepers gave you trouble or something."

Katniss abruptly pulled back, her hands curling tightly into the back of his shirt. "Why would you think that?" Her eyes were full of alarm.

He knit his brows slightly, confused about her reaction. "Effie said they weren't very nice to her when she was getting onto the train."

"Oh." She relaxed and let go of his shirt. "No, I was just spending a little more time with my family, and then I went to go see Madge."

"Oh." Peeta's arms fell to his sides. He felt sheepish about the way he reacted. "I'm sorry." He muttered, looking down at the floor.

Katniss reached up and cupped his face, seeking his eyes with her own. "Hey," she said softly. Peeta looked at her. "It's ok. Don't be sorry, Peeta. Thank you for the concern." She stroked his cheek with her thumb.

"You know I'll always be concerned for you." He said, smiling crookedly.

Katniss smiled. "I know. Same goes for you."

Peeta smiled wider before leaning down and pressing his lips against hers in a tender kiss.

"Ugh, come on. There are no cameras, you don't have to do that." Haymitch groaned. Peeta could tell that Haymitch was starting to get drunk.

"Oh, you mean this?" Peeta wrapped his arms around Katniss waist and brought her flush against him. He kissed her again, this time more passionately. Katniss wrapped her arms around his neck and stood on her toes, trying to get more. Haymitch groaned loudly, telling them to stop. Neither listened, just continued kissing. Effie cleared her throat loudly, and they finally pulled away. Katniss had an adorable blush across her cheeks. Effie tapped her brush against her palm.

"Now that is enough of that. You can do whatever you want in privacy, but in front of other people, that isn't very polite."

"Sorry, Effie." Peeta said. "I just can't help myself sometimes."

Katniss giggled and laced her fingers with his. The door opened behind them, and they turned to see who it was. It was a Peacekeeper. Katniss backed away, pressing her shoulder against Peeta's back. Peeta looked at her, concerned by her reaction.

The Peacekeeper removed his helmet. He wasn't really all that scary looking without the helmet covering his face. He was rather young, dark skin and hair, but he had cold eyes. "We will be leaving for District Eleven now. We will arrive there approximately at ten thirty tomorrow morning. Dinner will be served at five thirty. Breakfast tomorrow will be served at eight. Please do not wander around. Certain cars have been made off limits. Areas you're welcome to stay in are the dining car, your private rooms, the closet car, and the sitting area in the caboose."

Peeta didn't recall so many instructions and rules last time they were on the train. He didn't bother asking questions though, because the Peacekeeper didn't look like he wanted to answer any.

"Oh, alright," Effie finally spoke up. "Thank you."

The man nodded, then left. Peeta fully turned to Katniss. She had a scowl on her face. "Don't remember having so many rules last time." She muttered.

"I guess that's because we were petrified Tributes, being sent off for death. They wanted us to feel pampered and special before we were used for their entertainment by slaughter."

"Peeta!" Effie exclaimed.

"What?"

"Watch what you say." Haymitch answered for her with a warning tone, giving Peeta a hard look. He didn't seem so drunk anymore.

"You should be grateful for what you have now. You've earned it." Effie said.

"By killing people." Katniss said. Effie gasped, but Katniss wasn't done. Peeta could see her starting to get really worked up. She dropped his hand. "The only reason we're here," she paused, gesturing around her and to Peeta, "is because we killed people. Kids. We killed other children so we could survive. And if we didn't, then they would have killed us. We're just expected to be perfectly fine after becoming Victors. To remember all the _brave warriors_ who fought and died, and live happily ever after when we've come out alive." Her voice had risen and she was practically screaming. Peeta looked at her, startled. "We're supposed to forget how that happened, how they were murdered for _nothing_. Forget watching people be killed, killing people yourself, and being so near death that you almost want it." Her voice was now a whisper. Peeta shuddered at her words, every single one of them rang with so much meaning. "Forget the terror you felt, pretend that terror doesn't rip through you at night, causing you to wake up screaming, trembling with fear." She was trembling, but she spoke a little louder. "How is anyone supposed to forget that, huh? How are we supposed to live the rest of our lives so afraid? Let me tell you, Effie, I don't care if you think I've earned anything, if anyone thinks that. I am _not_ grateful. I'm not grateful that now I live with a horror more prominent than any other fears I've ever had before." Peeta saw tears starting to form in her eyes and she ran out of the car.

He shakily ran a hand through his hair. Effie's mouth was gaping, but Peeta could find no words. He agreed completely with what Katniss had said. He knew he had to go find her. He set off in the direction she fled. He went through a several cars looking for her; she wasn't in her room, or his, or the closet car. She was in the caboose, sitting on the chair and staring out the window at the land passing by them.

"I'm not in the mood for a lecture. I'll apologize to Effie later, even though I'm not sorry." She said numbly, still staring out the window.

"I'm not going to lecture you." He said softly. She turned at the sound of his voice.

"P-Peeta. I thought you were Haymitch." She said. Her face was a mixture of emotions. Sadness, relief to see him, fear. He walked over to her and sat down beside her. He stretched out his arm and wrapped it around Katniss's shoulders, wrapping the other around her waist, pulling her onto his lap. She buried her face in his neck and he held her trembling body, whispering gently in her ear, telling her that everything was going to be ok and how much he loved her.


	3. Problems

_**A/N: Sorry it's been a while! Hopefully this extra long chapter will make up for it? I'm sorry. Hard to find time to write but here you go. This one's my longest chapter ever. (Seriously nearly five frickin thousand words!) Sorry for any spelling or grammar errors! **_

_**You guys are all awesome! Thanks for the follows and favourites, and the lovely reviews! Can't wait for more ;)**_

_**-Wolf**_

* * *

**Problems**

Katniss was seated in Peeta's lap, her forehead leaning against his temple. He stroked her thigh with his thumb while his other arm was around her back. She had finally calmed down after her outburst at Effie, but it had taken over two hours. She sighed and nuzzled Peeta's cheek.

"I hate being on this train. I wish it didn't have to take so long."

Peeta kissed her temple. "I know. When I got on I felt really uneasy. Everything just came flooding back to me."

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah; I'm with you now."

Katniss smiled and cupped his face. "I won't leave you." She said softly.

"Never." He confirmed. She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his in a tender kiss.

"I love you so much Peeta."

He tightened his arms around her. "I love you too."

"Can we go get some food?" She asked meekly.

He chuckled. "Of course."

She swivelled off his lap and stood up, linking their hands when he got up after her. They walked to the dining car but found no one else there. Katniss was relieved; even though she had cooled off she still wasn't sure what she might do if Effie was there. She wasn't quite ready to apologize yet. They asked for some lamb stew and croissants, and some hot chocolate. They ate in silence, and when they were finished a servant whisked away their dishes.

Katniss raised her eyes to the clock on the wall, seeing that it was quarter to six. She sighed and pushed her chair back from the table. "I better go find Effie and apologize for earlier."

"Are you sure? Do you want me to go with you?" He asked, standing up when she did.

Katniss shook her head. "I'll be fine. Thanks Peeta."

He nodded his head absently and Katniss left. She found Effie in her room, writing on what looked like note cards. She rapped lightly on the door and walked in when she was motioned to.

"Effie, I'm here to apologize about earlier. I'm really sorry about what I said before. It was out of line and I shouldn't have said any of it." She twisted her hands in front of her.

Effie looked at her like she was expecting some more. "Uh… I hope you can find it to forgive me. I promise not to say things like that anymore."

Effie gave her an endearing smile. "Thank you Katniss. That's alright, dear. Just try to keep things like that to yourself." She shook her finger at Katniss.

Katniss ducked her head, nodding sheepishly. She didn't actually care, but she wanted Effie to think she did. She cleared her throat. "So, what are you writing?"

Effie's eyes brightened up and she lifted the cards higher. "I'm writing out yours and Peeta's speeches for the Tour!"

"You're writing the speeches for us?" She asked.

"You can add personal touches at the end if you'd like to, but otherwise this is what you'll be saying in front of the District."

"Oh. Alright." She thought about it a little more and realized how glad she was that she wouldn't have to think of anything herself. "Thanks, Effie. That's very nice of you."

"Oh, I had to write them anyway, but you're welcome."

"What do you mean, you had to write them anyway?" Katniss inquired.

"It is required of the Capitol." Effie said, setting the cards down.

Katniss tried not to let that bother her. "Oh, I see. Well, I'll see you tomorrow. I have to go to the garment car and talk to Cinna."

"Alright. Don't stay up too late! We have a big, big, big day tomorrow!"

"I won't." She said before turning around and leaving. She strode down the corridor to get to the closet car. She passed a small room, it wasn't the control room, and she was nowhere near the engine, but it was full of computers and screens. She glanced inside and saw the Peacekeeper who had told them all of the rules. His fingers were madly flying over a touch pad. She glanced around the room, trying to decipher everything on the screens. They all seemed to show numbers, kind of like statistics. The Peacekeeper saw her standing there, narrowed his eyes and pressed something that slammed the door in her face. She heard it lock as she glared at the smooth metal. What was so important that the door had to be shut on her? Why was she limited in areas she was allowed to go to on the train? She scowled at the door for a moment longer before continuing on her way to the closet car.

She had to get used to talking about clothing design because that was her "talent". It couldn't be hunting, unfortunately, and that was the only thing Katniss found she had a talent for. Upon requests of Effie and her mother, she had tried to play the flute, arrange flowers, and a few other silly things that she was terrible at. She wasn't an awful singer, but there was no way she'd sing in front of all of Panem. Cinna stepped in to save her and told her that he could help her start designing clothes. She wasn't very good at that either; after a few tries Cinna decided it was better that he stick to the designing. He'd ask Katniss some questions and a few minutes later he would have something sketched on a mannequin. He told Katniss that they could keep going like that so it looked like Katniss had picked her talent. She was absolutely grateful and felt like she owed him so much.

She waited for the door to open and stepped inside the garment car. Cinna was looking at some clothes hanging on a rack. "Oh, there you are. We missed you at dinner." He said.

"I was with Peeta in the caboose. We had dinner not that long ago. What am I going to be wearing tomorrow?" She approached the rack Cinna was looking through and touched one of the dresses.

"Not sure yet. I still need to think about it." He said, giving her a small smile.

"Well, whatever you think is best. I don't really care what I wear."

"Oh, come now Katniss. You've got to care about your clothes, considering your talent." He winked at her and Katniss smiled wickedly.

"Speaking of which, do you have anything else you want to coach me on?" She dropped her hand and crossed her arms over her chest.

"No, I don't think so. I've told you pretty much all you need to know at this point. If I need to tell you something else, then I most certainly will. Did you have any questions?"

Katniss shook her head. "No. I hope you know how grateful I am to you for helping me out with all of this."

Cinna smiled kindly and pulled her into a hug. "That's what friends are for. Now are you ok from earlier? I heard about it during dinner," he said as he pulled back.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Peeta calmed me down after a while."

Cinna smiled knowingly at the mention of Peeta. "I heard his talent was painting, and I went to go see them in the storage car. They're quite lovely." He mused.

Katniss nodded, trying to suppress her massive grin as she thought about all of the beautiful things Peeta had painted. "Peeta's a very good painter."

"Yes, he is. I've heard from Portia that he's got some very interesting paintings." Cinna raised his eyebrows and Katniss blushed. "You two really seem happy together." He said softly.

Katniss let her grin fully appear. "We are." She replied.

"Yeah? I know how things weren't all well when you left the Capitol…"

Katniss shook her head, her smile disappearing. "I didn't know how I felt about Peeta until after we got home. I knew I cared about him, loved him in some way… but I wasn't sure how. After a while it hit me, I mean it _really_ hit me that I was in love with him. I only wish I had known sooner to avoid giving Peeta so much pain."

Cinna looked at her sympathetically. "Well what you have now is all that matters."

Katniss nodded and smiled. "Yeah."

"Well I'm going to go to my room. I still need to work out your outfit and everything. I'll see you tomorrow during breakfast."

"Ok. Good night." Cinna left and Katniss decided to go to the storage car to look at Peeta's paintings. She wanted to know which ones had been brought. When she got inside she walked past all the crates of food and supplies before finding the paintings. The only one with one of them in it was of Katniss looking out of the kitchen window. The rest were of nature. There were trees with their brilliant autumn leaves, a flower, the Mockingjay from his first time in the woods, a stream with glistening rocks, and a few other beautiful landscapes. She was relieved that none of the other ones had been brought along, because she was positive that they would be auctioned off for ridiculous prices in the Capitol. She didn't want some random Capitol person to have one of the special paintings Peeta had made of her, or her favourite, the one of them standing close together, facing each other, Peeta holding her waist and Katniss cupping his face. When Peeta had finished that painting she was nearly in tears. It was so beautiful and so _perfect._ She could see their love in a different perspective and it made her heart ache.

Now she really wanted to go find Peeta. She left the storage car and passed through the closet car. She entered the dining car, since that was where she left Peeta earlier, but he wasn't there. She glanced at the clock and saw that an hour had passed by. She furrowed her brow and went to see if he had gone to her room, thinking that he'd just meet her in there. The door glided open and she stepped inside, looking around for him. She heard the door shut behind her and heard the lock click into place. She spun around and moved to it. Someone had manually locked her in. She pushed her unlock button but it didn't work. She tried to pull it open but it wouldn't budge.

She strode over to her service command and pressed the button to talk. "Um, excuse me, but my door is locked and it won't open." She claimed. She took her finger off her button and shifted her weight to her other foot.

A cool voice answered from the speaker. "All passengers are required to stay in their own cabins."

Katniss pressed the button again. "Well, why is it locked?"

"All passengers are required to stay in their own cabins."

Katniss narrowed her eyes. She was talking to a robot. "Where's Peeta?"

"All passengers are required to-

Katniss slapped the button, cutting off the machine. "I demand to speak with the driver."

After a few moments of silence a new voice came through. "Miss. Everdeen, is there something I can help you with?"

"Yes, why is my door locked? Where's Peeta?"

There was silence on the other end. Katniss tried to act innocent, like the foolish girl Snow wanted her to be. "I miss him. He told me that he'd spend the night with me if it would make me more comfortable but now I can't get out of my room." She hated how pleading and desperate she sounded.

"It's… required that all passengers stay in separate cabins. Capitol requirements."

The hair on the back of Katniss's neck rose. "Oh, _please _couldn't you let him stay with me? I won't tell anyone! I promise!" She trilled, wanting to slap herself.

There was more silence on the other end. Her spine went rigid as she dreaded the thought of having to sleep without Peeta's arms around her, without his warm body pressed against hers. It had been a long time since Katniss had slept alone. If she still had nightmares even with Peeta beside her, how bad would they be without him?

"I don't know…" the man seemed really conflicted.

"_Please_." Katniss begged.

The intercom was silent. She heard a click and her door smoothly glided open. She ran out the door and over to Peeta's room. As soon as she got there the door slid open and Peeta stumbled out, colliding with her.

"Peeta!" she gasped as he struggled to keep them on their feet.

"I'm sorry! Are you ok? The door was locked I was trying to get out!" he exclaimed as they straightened. His crystal eyes were filled with apprehension as he gripped her shoulders.

"I'm fine. Let's go inside your room, ok?" she gently propelled him backwards with her hands on his stomach. When they were inside the door slid shut and the lock clicked into place. Peeta stared past Katniss at it as she wrapped her arms around his middle.

"Why are the doors locked?" He demanded, bringing his hands up to cradle her head.

"The Capitol wanted all passengers to stay in their own cabins. I called the driver and asked him to let me stay with you. I had to beg him. I put on my sweet innocent girl act and then my door opened and I came to see you." She rested her chin on his chest to look up at him.

"I should have thought of that. I've been here trying to open the door for twenty minutes." He looked down at her with sad eyes. "I was so scared that I wouldn't get to hold you tonight."

She cupped his face and he leaned his forehead against hers. "I was too. But it's ok, we're with each other now."

"I'm not letting you out of my sight, Katniss." He said deeply. She pulled back and looked at him. His eyes were so intense and iridescent that it made her shiver.

She brought her face to his. "Peeta." She whispered. He crashed his lips to hers in a searing kiss. He dropped his hands down her back and to her hips.

She let her fingers tangle in his hair as he lifted her up and put her on the bed. He broke away from her and took off his shirt, handing it to her. She always wore his shirt to bed, tonight was no different. "I'm going to go to the bathroom."

She nodded and shimmied out of her pants and shirt when the door closed. She brought the shirt to her face and smelled it. She grinned as she smelled the faint trace of Peeta's cologne, the soap he always used. She pulled it on then folded her clothes, leaving them on the stand next to the bed. Peeta came out of the bathroom wearing sweatpants. She smiled at him before going in herself. Looking in the mirror, she pulled out the pins and clips and ran her fingers through her hair, trying to get it back to its normal form.

After she cleaned her teeth and everything she exited and slunk under the covers of the bed. Peeta held his arm out and she slid over until her body was pressed against his. She nuzzled her face into his neck and ran her hand over the smooth skin on his chest.

"I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have this tonight." She murmured.

"Probably would have smashed everything in your room." He whispered teasingly into her hair.

She curled her fingers over his chest and smiled. "What would you have done, hmm?"

"Sat down against the door and be afraid of sleeping. I would have rushed to your room as soon as that door opened and scooped you up…"

She peppered the side of his face with kisses. "Well, nothing can keep us apart, Peeta. Not for long."

He smirked. "Not even the Capitol."

She snuggled in closer. "Not even the Capitol. I love you, Peeta."

He shifted so he was facing her and wrapped his other arm around her. "I love you too."

She moved her face to a more comfortable position and fell asleep.

* * *

She couldn't say she had the best night's sleep that night. Even though she was with Peeta, nightmares still plagued her. Being back on the train was too much, especially with the scare of not being able to be with Peeta that night.

Every time she woke up, he'd coax her back to sleep. She didn't remember a time when he woke her up, so she guessed he was already awake every time she woke up. When morning finally came she lay there clutching Peeta's hand. She brought it to her lips and placed a kiss on it.

"Hey." He said, his voice deep and throaty.

"Hi." She whispered, craning her head to look at him. He squeezed her hand and kissed her forehead. "Peeta did you even sleep at all?"

"Yeah, a little bit. I wanted to make sure you always got back to sleep ok." He sounded really tired and Katniss's heart melted.

"You didn't have to do that."

"I wouldn't have been able to go back to sleep if I didn't."

She felt her heart sink down into her stomach. "Peeta," she kissed him on the lips.

There was a series of knocks at the door. "Wake up, it's almost time for breakfast!" Effie chirped.

Katniss groaned and pushed back the covers. "I'm going to my room to get some clothes. I'll see you in the dining car in a few minutes."

"Ok." Peeta sighed. Katniss pushed the button to open the door and checked down the hallway for anyone before slipping out of Peeta's cabin. It would have been pretty embarrassing if someone saw her wearing just Peeta's shirt. She quickly walked to her cabin and slipped inside. She used her bathroom and changed into the first things she found in one of the drawers. She left her hair hanging down her back because the prep team would have their way with it soon. She slipped on some shoes and went down to the dining car. She plopped down in her chair next to Peeta. He offered her a smile, which she returned. Haymitch was nowhere in sight, and neither was Peeta's prep team. Venia, Flavius and Octavia were all there, sitting quietly, looking ragged. They were probably not used to waking up so early. They knock back several cups of coffee and share brightly coloured pills. Their eyes stop looking so dull by the end of breakfast.

Effie piped up from the head of the table. "Ok, now Katniss you need to go start getting prepped. You and your team will go to your room and Cinna will come in with your outfit when you're ready."

"Ok." Katniss said tiredly. "What about Peeta?" she asked curiously.

"He doesn't need as much prepping as you." She said.

"Oh." Katniss mumbled. Katniss had to have all the hair ripped from her body, and Peeta didn't. Katniss had to wear more makeup than Peeta, and her hair took longer.

Peeta leaned over the arm of his chair. "I'll see you in an hour or two, ok?"

She stared into his blue orbs and nodded silently. She got up and followed her team with dread to her room.

Her team was unusually quiet, their usual chitter turned down to a few words every now and then. She could hear every follicle of her hair being ripped from her body and she tried not to cringe too much. After soaking in several baths, the team started on her makeup.

Flavius tilted up her chin and sighed. "It's a shame Cinna said no alterations on you."

"Yes, we could really make you something special." Said Octavia.

"When she's older," Venia says grimly. "Then he'll have to let us."

Katniss was appalled. Do what? Blow up her lips, tattoo her body, dye her skin and implant gems? Give her whiskers or carve patterns in her face? Give her talons like a hawk? Make her look like the freakish Capitol people?

"You'll have to ask Peeta first." Katniss deadpanned. "I don't know if you know, but he likes _rather_ much the way I look now. I don't know how he'd react if you tried anything on me."

They all tittered as if that were truly hilarious. "Oh, Katniss we could make you look extravagant!"

"Peeta thinks I'm beautiful the way I am now, and that's all I care about." She said, monotone.

Her team defensively told her that she _was_ beautiful, they were just thinking of ways to enhance it. She was saved when Cinna arrived. He shooed them all away and finished Katniss's prep in the silence she needed.

* * *

She met Peeta in the caboose. They sat down on the couch and looked out the window. "You look gorgeous." He said.

"Thanks." She muttered, her skin still crawling from earlier. "You look nice too."

"Thanks."

They sat in silence and both stood up at the same time as they approached District Eleven. Huge fences rose up before them, barbed wire curling heavily at the top. There were evenly spread out watch towers, manned with armed guards, spread out amongst fields of wild flowers. Despite what Rue had told her about her District, Katniss never imagined it like this. When they passed through the gates, the crop fields began. And never seemed to end. She knew it was a large District but she had never known how large until then. She couldn't imagine how many people lived there.

When they arrived at the station, they were greeted only by Peacekeepers. Effie seemed disgusted. "Well this isn't very _festive_!" Katniss and Peeta glanced at each other uneasily and followed everyone else into a black Jeep. Effie handed them their speech cards and babbled on about something Katniss wasn't listening too.

Rue lived here. Rue had a family here and she'd see them today. What was she going to say about Rue? Every time she thought about it her throat closed up. Peeta put his hand on her arm and she looked at him. "I can do the talking if you want."

Katniss's shoulders dropped. "Thank you." Peeta nodded and clasped her hand. When they arrived they were quickly ushered out by more Peacekeepers. Katniss barely had any time to look around as they entered a building and reached the front entrance. She could hear them being introduced on the other side of the doors. Effie came up behind them.

"Ok, big smiles! Keep your shoulders up! This is your moment. Read the cards, read the cards!" she breathed at them just before the doors opened up to them. There was a massive applause but Katniss heard it as if it were miles away. There was a huge banner with Rue on it, one with Thresh on it as well. There was a huge lump in her throat as they walked up to the microphone. Standing beneath the banners were the families of the dead Tributes. Under Rue's banner stood five children and their mother and father. Katniss ripped her eyes away before she could think about how much they all resembled Rue and looked to see and old woman and a muscular girl under Thresh's banner. Probably his grandmother and older sister.

Two young girls stepped forwards and presented Peeta and Katniss with flowers. She smiled and accepted them, trying to hide her pain. When the applause died down, Peeta thanked everyone and started to read off of his cards. He slowed down a bit and before he was done, he put them down at his sides. Katniss widened her eyes at him as he began to speak freely. "They fought with honor and dignity until the end. Both Thresh and Rue were so young. But our lives aren't just measured in years. The measure in our lives are the people we touch around us. For myself, for Katniss. We know that without Thresh and Rue, we wouldn't be standing here today. It can in no way replace your losses, but as a token of our thanks we'd like for each of the tributes families from District Eleven to receive on month of our winnings every year for the duration of our lives."

The crowd gasped; could he even do that? Even Katniss was stunned. Then the mayor stepped forwards to present them with their plaques. They were about to leave when Katniss noticed one of Rue's sisters staring at her. She looked so much like Rue that Katniss felt her knees shake. Rue's sister was looking at her with reproach. _Because she hadn't thanked Rue._ Katniss had said nothing at all.

She stepped to the mic. "Wait!" She said, clutching the plaque to her chest. "I just wanted to say that I didn't know Thresh, I only spoke to him once. He could have killed me, but instead he showed me mercy. That's a debt I'll never be able to repay. I respected him. Not only for sparing me, but for his power, for his refusal to play the Games on anyone's terms but his own. The Careers wanted him to team up with them from the beginning, but he wouldn't do that. I will always respect him for that." She turned from Thresh's family and looked to Rue's. She felt her lips start to tremble. "But I did know Rue. She wasn't just my ally, she was my friend. I see her in the flowers that grow in the meadow by my house. I hear her in the Mockingjay song. I see her in my sister Prim. She was too young, too gentle. And I couldn't save her. I'm sorry." She ended, tears welling up in her eyes.

Somewhere out in the crowd, Katniss heard the four note tune she and Rue used to signal each other in the arena. By the end of it, she's spotted the whistler. An old man in faded clothes, standing with his chin high. He kisses his three left fingers and raised them in the air. All in unison, the rest of the District does the same. Her tears dried up when she saw Peacekeepers push through the crowd and grab the old man. The dragged him forwards and Peacekeepers took her arms, as well as Peeta's and brought them back inside.

"No! No leave him alone! Just leave him alone!" Katniss cried.

When she was inside and thrown to the floor, the door shut just in time for her to see a Peacekeeper shoot the old man in the head. She screamed and scrambled off the floor, held back by Peeta and Haymitch. "Get off me! Get off me!" She yelled.

Haymitch let her go but Peeta didn't. "Katniss! Stop! Hey, hey look at me!" He said. "You need to stop." Katniss went limp in his arms and began to sob. She let him guide her up some stairs. Where were they going?

They were in the attic of the building, and Haymitch was waiting for them there. "You two have very simple task." Haymitch said roughly.

"I never meant for anyone to get killed. He has to know that." Katniss said through her tears.

"What are you talking about, who has to know what?" Haymitch said, shaking his head.

"Snow." Katniss breathed. "He came to see me." She saw Peeta's jaw drop from the corner of her eye. "He's worried about rebellion in the Districts. He thinks that they don't believe our love story."

"You know Katniss you really should have told me that before I tried to give these people the money!" Peeta lashed out and hit a lamp, making it sail across the room and smash on the floor.

She looked at him, bewildered. "I'm sorry! I didn't know what to do, he threatened to kill my family!"

"What about my family? I have people that I have to protect too! Why didn't you tell me?" He yells. He gave her a betrayed look and hit a vase, sending it crashing against the wall. He tugged at his hair, his shoulders heaving.

"Peeta, I'm sorry!" She reached out to touch his shoulder but he recoiled violently.

"Don't!" he said, raising his hands up to his shoulders. He backed away until he was at the stairs, and from there he disappeared from sight.

Katniss let out a sob and turned back to Haymitch.

"Katniss, what were you thinking?"

"Please, please just help me get through this trip. Please just help us get through this." She begged desperately.

"This trip? Wake up, girl." He snapped his fingers in front of her tear soaked face. "This trip isn't going to end when you get back home! It's never going to. You two are mentors now, you _never_ get off that train. But right now, your job is to be a distraction, so people forget what the real problems are."

Katniss nodded, not able to speak. Be a distraction so people forget what the real problems are. More tears slipped out of her eyes. She had created a very real problem, not just with the uprising, but with Peeta.


	4. Apologies

**Apologies **

Peeta brushed past the Peacekeepers and people of District Eleven. His fists were clenched and so was his jaw. He couldn't believe it. He couldn't believe _her. _

He saw Effie waving him over. He let his jaw slacken. "Effie, are we leaving?"

"Yes, we are. Where are Katniss and Haymitch?" She asked frantically, looking behind him.

"They'll get here soon. Effie, I'm not feeling to well, do you mind if I go back to the train now?"

"Oh, you poor thing." Effie pouted. "But I'm afraid we all have to go together."

Peeta's shoulders sagged. "Oh."

Effie frowned and reached for his hands, holding them gently. "Well how about you stay here and I go find Katniss and Haymitch?"

"Ok." Peeta said quietly.

Effie smiled softly at him and squeezed his hands before letting go and trotting off to find the others. Peeta crossed his arms over his chest and waited for Effie to retrieve Haymitch and Katniss. It didn't take too long; soon enough he could see Effie's bright wig and two people with her. He began walking to the back of the building as soon as Effie was next to him. He didn't wait up for Katniss and when they got to the car, he sat as far away from her as possible, close to the door to allow for a quick escape. He didn't look in her direction, never met her pleading gaze. He didn't want her to see the hurt betrayal in his eyes.

The ride back to the train station seemed much longer than going to Eleven's Justice Building. When they finally arrived and the door opened, Peeta hopped out and jogged up the stairs to the platform. There were many Peacekeepers, and now he knew why. He shook his head and slipped inside the train and headed straight to his room. He locked the door and went into his bathroom. His stripped his stiff clothes and stepped into the fancy shower. He pushed a button to make the water fall down on him like rain. It was hot, matching the heat from his angry flushed skin.

He tilted his head back and let the water fall on his face. He scrubbed off all the make-up and ran his hands through his hair. He shampooed it until he was absolutely certain all of the gel was out. Then he conditioned it and scrubbed his body raw with soap. He stood under the water rinsing for a long time. When he finally got out it his fingers were wrinkled and his skin red.

He dried himself off and changed into some comfortable loose black pants and a green long sleeved shirt. Then he stared down at his bed, regarding the fresh made sheets that left no evidence that Katniss had spent the night with him. He still couldn't believe Katniss. How could she have been so nonchalant when she was hiding something so big from him? Snow had been in her mother's house, and he had _threatened_ her. _And she didn't think it was important to tell him? _Even when he had asked her if anything was wrong she didn't say anything. He couldn't believe that she had lied to him. He guessed he knew now why Katniss had been so weird around the Peacekeeper.

He let out a sigh and looked at the clock. It was half past noon. He debated leaving his room for some lunch and decided against it. He went over to his intercom and ordered in some food. His plate of steamy roast beef and gravy came quickly with a side of buttery rolls. He ate slowly, trying to think about anything other than the betrayal he felt. When he was done he set his plate down and decided that it was better to stay in his room rather than go anywhere else, because then he'd probably see someone and have to talk to them.

A knock at the door spoiled his plan of being alone. He groaned and threw his head back as he walked to answer the door. Haymitch stood on the other side.

"What?" Peeta asked tiredly.

"Come on, kid. We've got to talk."

"If you want to talk we can talk right here."

Haymitch sighed but brushed past Peeta into the room anyway. Peeta turned around to find Haymitch ordering some liquor. Peeta shook his head and sat down on the couch by the window. "So, what did you want to talk about?"

Haymitch turned around with a glass of amber liquid in it. He gave Peeta a hard look as he swirled his drink around. "I didn't expect that kind of reaction from you, kid."

Peeta lowered his eyes. "Yeah, well, I didn't ever think I'd have to react like that."

"Did you ever think about how she felt? How about how she's feeling now? Especially after all that? I'm surprised she even showed up at lunch. She was holding back tears nearly the entire time."

Peeta brought his eyes up and clenched his fists. Haymitch was trying to make him feel bad when Katniss was the one who lied? "Oh yeah? Well if she felt so bad then why didn't she let me know? How come she didn't tell me any of that? I could have helped her deal with it, but she kept it from me." He said numbly.

Haymitch sighed and knocked back his glass. "Peeta, I'm sorry if your feelings are hurt. But we've got a bigger problem right now, alright?"

Peeta folded his arms over his chest and looked away.

"You need to stick to reading those cards that Effie writes you. If Snow is worried about uprising in the Districts, then we have a very serious problem. You two need to be a distraction from the real problems."

"Fine. I'm sorry I didn't read from the cards today." He ran the idea of rebellion through his head. Was it even possible?

"That's fine, but just don't do it again. You don't really know how much power he has, and what he can do if you two don't do your job."

Peeta didn't want to think about what Snow could do to them. He recalled how Katniss told him that Snow had threatened to kill her family. He thought about how scared she must have felt. She didn't tell him because she didn't want him to worry.

But wasn't honesty still important? Didn't she know that Peeta would have put out through the fear and make her feel better? Didn't she _want_ his comfort? He knew that he'd want hers if the roles were switched. He also knew that he had loved her for a lot longer than she had loved him. _Stop,_ he thought immediately. That was stupid. He shoved the thoughts to the back of his mind. He didn't want to admit it, but he was truly hurt.

"Ok, I get it."

Haymitch narrowed his eyes. "Do you get it? If you two can't be a truly believable story then who knows what could happen. This is very, _very_ serious."

"Alright! I understand, ok? You don't have to lecture me."

Haymitch gave Peeta a hard stare before finishing the rest of his drink. He left it beside Peeta's lunch plate. He walked over to the door, but when it opened he didn't leave. He turned and looked at Peeta. "I think you two need to talk."

"I think you should go." Peeta said, standing up and turning to look out the window. The last thing he wanted was relationship advice from their drunk mentor.

"Alright." Haymitch relented. Peeta wracked his hands through his hair when he heard the door shut. He fisted his hair and rested his elbows against the window pane. He shut his eyes and exhaled deeply. He let go of his hair and backed away from the window. He lay down on the couch and stared at the patterns on the ceiling, trying not to think. Of Katniss, the Tour, Snow, the Districts, rebellion. Of anything. Eventually, the sleep he lost last night caught up with him and his eyes fell shut.

* * *

_He woke up, it was dark. The floor of the cave was hard against his back, but the pain he was used to feeling in his leg had faded. He looked down at it and was shocked to see the bleeding and swelling had gone down immensely. He saw a needle and a very small bag beside him. He also so a hand. A bloody, small hand, dotted with calluses. _

"_Katniss?" he whispered, looking at her limp form. "Oh my god." There was a large cut on her forehead, seeping blood that coated her hair and face. He still couldn't use his leg very well but he dragged himself over to her and lightly pressed his fingers lightly against her neck, feeling a weak but steady pulse. She had lost a lot of blood. _

_Peeta scrambled to find a bandage inside the small bag. He cleaned the wound as best he could and then wrapped it up, being careful not to touch it. He tied it well and wet a cloth to clean up her face. When he was satisfied he lay the sleeping bag on her and sat up against the wall, lightly stroking her hair. _

_He dozed off without meaning too. A crack of thunder woke him up. He looked down at Katniss. She was deathly pale. He couldn't see the small rise and fall of her chest. "Katniss?" he said, dread filling his limbs like lead. He touched her cheek and gasped when he felt how cold it was. He leaned closer to her. "Katniss? Katniss, please!" he felt for her pulse but it was gone. "Oh, no. No no no. This can't be happening. Wake up! Katniss, please, wake up!"_

* * *

Peeta started violently at the sound of the cannon, effectively waking him up. There was no light in his room, the sun had set and the moon was blocked out clouds. He sat up and rubbed his shaky hands over his face. It was a dream. It was just a dream. He felt a cold bead of sweat trickle down his spine. Without another thought, Peeta got up and left his cabin in a haste. He skidded to Katniss's room, but she wasn't inside. He could only think of one other place she'd go on the train.

He took a deep breath, stuck his hands in his pockets and walked to the back of the train. The door slid open and he saw Katniss curled up on the couch, facing the window like she was yesterday. A silent wave of relief rushed through him. He walked in a little bit, but Katniss didn't notice him. He leaned one of his shoulders against the wall.

"I'm sorry, Katniss." He whispered quietly. It didn't matter though, because Katniss flinched violently and turned to him.

"Peeta," she breathed, her taught muscles relaxing.

"I shouldn't have freaked out like that before. I just got frustrated…" he shrugged his shoulders half-heartedly. "I'm sorry."

Katniss swung her legs down and stood up. "No, I'm sorry. I should have told you." She said in a small voice. She twisted her hands in front of her. "I shouldn't have kept that from you. I was just really scared and-and-"

"You shouldn't have kept it from me." Peeta confirmed, crossing his arms over his chest. "Katniss I could have helped you deal with it. Didn't you want me to?" He couldn't keep the hurt from creeping into his voice.

Katniss shoulders dropped. "I didn't want you to have to do that. I don't want to worry you with all of this because it's _my fault_. I started all of this, not you. You shouldn't have to be the one to-"

Peeta stopped leaning against the wall and walked towards her. "To what? Deal with this? Because that's not true. We're in this together, Katniss, and we have been from the beginning. It's the star-crossed lovers act. Plural. Me and you until the end. If you didn't think I'd have to deal with some of this…" he finished tiredly, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Yeah, but I caused all of this. It's my fault! Don't you get it? I'm the reason all of this happened! _I did this_. Not you. I'm the problem, Peeta. You shouldn't have to fix it because you're not the one who messed it up in the first place. I'm the one who pulled out those berries."

Peeta stopped right in front of her. "I went along with it. I agreed with you and I was going to eat those berries. I was a hundred percent willing to do it. I'm in this just as much as you are. You should've known that I'd help you get through all this, and that I wouldn't have a single problem doing so."

Katniss dropped her hands and gave him an exasperated look. "Peeta, I'm sorry, ok? What do you want me to say?" Her eyes started to fill with tears.

Peeta leaned down and held her face in his hands. He looked into her watery silver eyes and wiped away the tears that dripped down her cheeks. "Katniss, I love you. You need to know that no matter what, through any situation no matter how messed up, or how scary it is, I will be there right beside you. That's what I'm here for, and it's what I want to do. _Always_."

"Oh, Peeta." She sobbed. "I'm so sorry." She collapsed into his arms. He cradled held her trembling figure in his arms. She wept harder into his shirt. He scooped her up and took her to her room. The door locked behind them but Peeta didn't care. He set her down on the bed and went to the bathroom. When he was done he took off his shirt and held it out for Katniss. A ghost of a smile formed on her tear-stained face.

"Green. It's my favourite colour."

"Really? I never knew." Peeta said gently.

"Yeah. What's yours?" She asked, replacing her own shirt for Peeta's.

"Orange." He said softly.

Katniss quirked her brow. "Like Effie's hair?"

"No," Peeta chuckled as he got under the covers. "Not bright orange, but soft. Like the sunset."

"Oh." She said, climbing in after him. She slunk over to his side and rested her head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry." She said, almost inaudibly.

"Are you ok?" Peeta asked after a little bit.

"Peeta… I'm just so scared. If we don't convince the people in the Districts what will happen? Snow threatened to kill, and I know that he will if he gets the chance." She pulled back and touched his face. Her eyes were forbidding. "What if he takes you from me? I'd have _nothing_."

"That's not going to happen. We'll get through this, ok? It's going to be fine." He said, thinking about her words. He was feeling the exact same as her. If Katniss was gone… he didn't know how he could live.

Katniss entwined her fingers with his and turned on her side. Peeta cupped her body with his and rested his cheek on her ear.

"Stay with me." She whispered.

"Always." He murmured.

* * *

The rest of the Tour in the Districts was very routine. Every night he and Katniss shared the same bed, always coaxing the other back to sleep after they had been awakened by nightmares. Then came the tedious part. Get dressed. Drive to the Justice Building. Read their parts on the cards. Receive their plaques, flowers and other gifts. Get ushered back inside quickly by Peacekeepers. They were always connected somehow, either by their hands or linked elbows, or arms around shoulders and waists. They often sealed their speeches with a kiss, but it wasn't like their kisses when they were alone, it was almost forced. It was too stiff for Peeta's liking and he made sure to make up for it when they got the chance. Katniss was eager to receive, and both would lose themselves trying to forget their day.

Sometimes there were riots. Sometimes there was no applause, and if there was, it was half-hearted and awkward. Peeta did his best to show people that he and Katniss really did love each other, to the extent where they'd purposely get caught trying to sneak off together, but he wasn't so sure they cared.

Tomorrow was the last day of the Tour. They'd finally be in the Capitol for the largest party, at the Presidential Palace. Haymitch had asked to talk to them both in private. They were sitting in the caboose.

"Snow has been, and still is, watching us. If he wanted you to pacify the Districts, I promise you, he's not happy. I know that you two, well, I know it's not an act anymore, but it didn't seem very real. Instead of being in love you two sounded like you were reciting from a drilling manual." Haymitch stated.

"You try reading the stuff that Effie writes us. I'd never say any of that." Peeta said.

"Yeah Haymitch, and if Peeta wouldn't say any of that then do you think Iwould?" Katniss muttered.

"Tell that to President Snow when you see him tomorrow." Haymitch said gruffly.

"I'm open to suggestions. Anything that can help is fine with me. I just want this all to be done with." Peeta said, leaning his head back to stare at the ceiling.

"I don't know, Peeta." Haymitch said.

Katniss cleared her throat beside him. "We could get married." She said in a small voice.

Peeta's head snapped up. "What?" He and Haymitch said in shocked unison.

Katniss spoke louder. "We could get married. If, like you said, we're on this train forever, then it would be bound to happen anyway. The proposal could be during an interview, a filmed one. Everyone would see it." No one said anything. "They'd be prying into our life every year, it would happen eventually and you know it."

"Well that would certainly make a statement." Haymitch commended.

Peeta really didn't know what to say. Obviously he wanted to marry Katniss. It would be a dream come true. But now? Weren't they still a little too young? Just a few months ago their parents kept them apart because they slept in the same bed. How would they react to marriage? Even though Peeta had made it clear that they couldn't stop his and Katniss's relationship, he still valued his family, not to mention Katniss's.

But what bugged him the most is that it would be forced, it wouldn't be real. It wasn't the time for them to get married. Did she even want it? She had only suggested it as a last resort to convince everyone. Peeta wanted it to be _real_.

"Yeah, sure. Let's do it." He said as he stood up. He couldn't stay there anymore. His emotions were starting to overwhelm him. He started to walk toward the door.

"Peeta!" He heard Katniss call after him. He didn't turn around and heard Haymitch tell her to give him a minute.

Peeta walked to his room and went to the window. He blankly watched the trees passing by for what seemed like years. He heard his door open behind him, but didn't turn around. After a moment Katniss wrapped her arms around him from behind and pressed her cheek against his spine. Peeta shut his eyes at her touch.

"Peeta, I'm sorry." She whispered.

"I just wanted it to be real." He said wistfully. "Without all the glory from the Capitol, you know? At a better time. When we were older."

"I know. I'm sorry, but I don't know what else we can do." Katniss kissed a few of the vertebrae in his spine. "I used to never want to get married. But then I realized that I was in love with you and that all changed. I know I want to be with you for the rest of my life, Peeta. I do want to marry you, but when we're not seventeen. But we don't have any other option. I know what you mean because I feel the same way." She said softly. "I wish we could have waited for the perfect moment."

"Me too." Peeta turned around and held Katniss's face in his hands. "But it doesn't seem as though we'll ever get the perfect moment." He gave her a miserable smile.

"No it doesn't." she whispered sadly as she rose up on her toes. "I'm sorry." She kissed him then, her soft lips molding against his tenderly. He stroked her cheeks with his thumbs and kissed her back with all the love he held in his heart. He ran his tongue along her bottom lip and she reached up to cup his face.

"I love you, Peeta." She whispered when they pulled apart. "No matter what."

"I know. I love you too."


End file.
